


Halt and catch fire

by Happy_pink_pony



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Multiple Personalities, Sad, Tony Stark Has A Heart, who knows - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-04-26
Packaged: 2019-10-27 03:51:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17759267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Happy_pink_pony/pseuds/Happy_pink_pony
Summary: He wanted to run, to flee, to kill.“No, Petey said that’s wrong.”Petey isn’t here. Petey started all this.“No. We’re better than this. I’m better than this.”No, you’re not. You’re a monster, Wade.*Wade fights with his inner demon, Tony is worried and Peter just wants to help.





	1. Chapter 1

I wish you knew what it feels like.

The words ran in the mercenary's head. He hadn’t meant them, he was just angry. No he wasn’t angry he was just an awful person. Yeah, that’s what he was. An awful terrible excuse for a person. He wanted to run, to flee, to kill.

“No, Petey said that’s wrong.”

_Petey isn’t here. Petey started all this._

“No. We’re better than this. I’m better than this.” When did he pull out his knife?

_No you’re not. You’re a monster Wade._

“When did it start raining? Where’s the knife? No.”

Wade stood clad in his Deadpool suit covered in blood. He couldn’t hear anything other than his own pounding heartbeat. He felt like he trapped in the dark alleyway. He had to get away. Where was his knife? Where was Petey?

He tried to call out for Peter but he stood there frozen. His knees buckled under him, causing him to fall onto the muddy ground. You can’t go back to Petey now. Look what you did! “I-it was an- an accident.” Wade choked on the words.

_It wasn’t an accident. You did this. Because of you that woman is no longer breathing._

“No…”

_No?_ Oh _, rest assured she is dead. Stabbed in the back with a dirty knife, doesn't it feel good?_

This couldn’t be happening. He’d been so good. He talked with Cap. He took Tin Man’s drugs and meditated with the Jolly Green Giant. Petey loved him. Why now? He begged to be found, to be helped. No one came. Wade Wilson sat in the dark, muddy water soaking through his suit with a dead body in front of him.

* * *

 

Peter woke up in his bed, snuggled by the blankets and pillows in a nice and warm cocoon. Gone were the summer mornings filled with sunlight and in came the gloomy autumn sky and heavy rain. New York is such a beautiful city in fall, Peter thought. The city lights gleaming in the mirror of wet pavement, the dancing leaves in central park and the aroma of coffee from a café on every corner.

Peter had half a mind to stay in bed all day, cuddling up to his fiance and watch trashy tv. They would order in and later on their patrol they’d complain about eating too much. Maybe some lazy, sappy sex. Oh yes, Peter had the whole day planned expect something, or rather someone, was missing.

Peter sheepishly opened his eyes to find himself alone. That’s strange, he thought, Wade didn’t tell him he had plans. Peter got out of bed and walking into their living room/kitchen. Wade wasn't there. He wasn’t in the shower Peter would have heard the water. Maybe he went out, an obvious lie, Peter told himself. Wade’s black and red hoodie was still on the couch where he left it and he wouldn’t go outside without being covered up. Peter hurried to their closet, fearing affirmation of his thoughts. Wade’s Deadpool suit was gone.

Peter was starting to get worried. Scratch that, Peter WAS worried. He grabbed his phone and dialed Wade. Three beats of silence.

“The number you dialed is currently unava-”

“Stupid phones!” Peter yelled. Wade wouldn’t just leave without telling him. Wade wouldn’t but someone else would. Peter hated this. But he knew what to do. Peter grabbed his Spider-Man suit and called Tony.

“Hey kid,” Thank god he picked up.

“Deadpool is back.” One of the few statements that could make Tony Stark quiet.

“I thought he was doing better, hell he was even patrolling with us.” Peter could hear Tony moving around now. A rouge Wade Wilson made Tony Stark annoyed, a rogue Deadpool made Tony Stark nervous.

“How long has he been gone?”

“I don’t know. He - he was sleeping when I came back from patrol last night around 3, he can’t have been gone more than 7 hours. How much damage could he have done?” They both knew the answer to that question. Luckily they wouldn’t have to.

“Jarvis found him, he’s in an ally between 3rd and Jamestown. Do you need back up?” The billionaire wanted Peter to say yes, but he knew better.

“No, just stand-by. I’ll call you.” Then he hung up. Peter knew Tony just wanted to help, but if Deadpool was still in control when he got there it would only make it worse. He brunette crawled out his bedroom window and turned on the mic in his suit, Tony didn’t say anything but Peter knew he’d answer should he need him or the other Avengers. Peter shuddered at the thought as he swung through town. Last time Deadpool took over Wade was gone for three weeks. It had been a little over a year ago, 38 people died in the two days it took to find him and capture him.

It had broken Peter’s heart to see the man he loved strapped to a hospital bed. Deadpool didn’t even know who Peter was, something Wade had fought to keep that way. Deadpool only knew Peter as the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man and it had to stay that way. In Deadpool’s eyes Wade was an enemy, a parasite that bothered him with morals and ethics. Deadpool had taken it upon himself to “unalive” any rapist, murdered and downright bad guys anyway he could. Just his luck that his parasite couldn’t die without him, so he’d just have to make him too weak to fight it. They might become one again. Knowing Peter was Wade’s fiance, there was no doubt he’d become top priority to the assassin.

“How we doing kid?” Tony’s voice rang loud and clear.

“I haven’t reached it yet but no fires, no police or general panic, so that’s a good sign.” Peter was starting to hope, but hope could be dangerous in this type of career. He landed on a rooftop before jumping into the ally. The rain from the sky fell the size of bullets and he was soaked to the bone. Then he was something.

“Deadpool.” He called trying not to sound too nervous. While Peter was very capable of fighting his own battles the man could regenerate and rip him into shreds before Peter could web himself away. He cautiously walked towards the shadow until his eyes adjusted to the darkness. He saw the dead body first. A woman in her late 40’s was laying face down in the mud, soaked by both blood and rain. She looked like a respectable woman, but knowing Deadpool she must have been anything but. Behind her sat a man, Peter wasn’t sure which. Recovered anti-hero or assassin for hire. Peter had to tread carefully.

“Hey there… buddy.” Peter crouched to get on level with the red-clad man in front of him.

“Petey…” A broken whisper was almost drowned by the rain but he heard it.

“Yes yes, I’m here Wade.” He was so relieved, yet still, there were so many questions and things to do.

“Come with me now.” He stretched out his hand for Wade to take it, but he didn’t. Wade was frozen on the ground and judging by how far he’d sunken into the mud, he had been for a long time.

“Tony, I’m gonna need a car and a crew.” The youngest had said those words many times when he got too drunk at his college graduation and threw up in the auditorium when he wanted to look cool rolling into the Star Wars premiere with MJ, when he got engaged and Wade gave him the roughest, longest and dirtiest night of life. Never had he needed to carry his ice-cold fiance into a car to drive him to the therapist in Avengers Towers while a crew took care of a murdered woman.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter gets Wade to the Tower and Tony has news about the murder victim.

The rain had softened the ground of the ally and turned dirt into sticky mud. Peter could usually lift Wade but with the drenched suit, Peter had to drag him. Wade seemed to be out cold now, the time he’d spent slummed together in the cold rain had finally gotten to him. He must have been exhausted, Peter thought, almost glad that Wade wasn’t awake for this. 

Wade’s legs drug deep trenches in the ground, scraping up more mud, making him even heavier. Peter felt so guilty. Why hadn’t he woken up when Wade left? Deadpool doesn’t come quietly forward, so Wade would have had to have left on his own. No. Peter shook his head, pushing the thought away. There was an explanation and they’d get it later. 

Thankfully the car Tony had sent was low riding and pulling Wade in easy enough. Peter pulled off his Spider-Man mask with a heavy sigh. Wade was lying on his back with his head resting in the younger’s lap. The partition was rolled up and the car windows blacked out. Peter could feel the dust hanging in the air like time had slowed its breath just to taunt him. 

Carefully he took Wade’s mask off, he knew the man wouldn’t like to be without it when they weren’t safe and alone in their apartment, but Peter needed to see him. Wade was having one of his bad skin days. The uneven skin was feverish to the touch, the polluted rain had dried in the cracks of his cheeks, creating light gray lines down his face. Peter took some tissues that were stashed in the seat pocket, he started wiping Wade’s face down, slowly he began talking to Wade, or rather himself.

“We’re gonna get you back on your feet,” A sad smile tugged at his lips, “Minor missteps can’t be avoided Wade, remember that. This wasn’t your fault.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to his fiance’s forehead. There, Peter thought, all clean again. 

When the car stopped Peter knew they had reached Avengers Tower. Wade was still out cold, but Peter still put Wade’s mask on him, he knew Wade wouldn’t like the others to see him on a day like this. 

Luckily for Peter, most of the mud had tried in the warm car, which made it easier to carry the six foot 4 man to the elevator. The driver had left before Peter had gotten Wade out of the car, he was grateful for that. 

“Young mister Parker and Dope-ass Fresh Prince,” Jarvis greeted as the elevator doors closed. Peter pushed the hospital floor. 

“Jarvis would you alarm Dr. Banner that we’re on our way up?” Ever the polite neighborhood spider he was. If Wade was better he would have made a joke about how well raised Peter was. But he wasn’t better. 

“Dr. Banner has been notified and is standing ready sir.” Peter sighed, this wasn’t how he wanted his day to go. 

\--

Peter met up with Tony on the top floor. He’d flown in from the compound to tell Peter the information about the woman Deadpool had killed. 

Peter collapsed on a couch without a word. He shouldn’t be this tired after a long night’s sleep. He was still dressed in his Spider-Man suit, his suit was dry now but so cold, the kind of cold that stuck to your bones and stayed there. He wrapped a thick blanket around himself,  
a disappointing replacement for what, or rather who, he wanted to be wrapped around him.

“Not even a hello?” Tony stood with his back turned from Peter. He was looking out over the city he and Wade were supposed to protect, along with the rest of the world. 

“I’m sorry Mr. Stark,” His eyes were still closed, as he sat up mechanically. “It’s been a rough morning.”

“I know kid. Let’s get this over with.” He pulled up a file on the screen and Peter finally opened his eyes. He wishes he hadn’t. 

There were two pictures of the woman Deadpool had killed, one before and one after. She looked like a respectable woman, mid ’50s, clean and professional looking dresses. She didn’t look like a criminal. Then again Peter didn’t look like a biomechanical engineer with a spandex-clad nightlife. 

“Margrethe Johnson, 52 years old. Lawyer.” Tony deadpanned, he enhanced the after picture. “Turns out Margrethe didn’t just serve dirtbags in court,” Tony breathed in sharply, “she ran a child prostitution ring.” 

Peter didn’t know his stomach could drop any further. He felt disgusted that he pitied the woman, yet he didn’t believe murder was the right thing to do. 

“How you feeling kid?” Tony himself was conflicted. Part of him felt the woman got what she deserved, ganked in a muddy alleyway, another could only think about Wade. Ever since Peter had introduced his boyfriend Tony had not been a fan, and he tried to split them up when he found out about Wade’s second personality. But he felt for the guy. After years of tolerating the bald weirdo, he grew to accept him. Then one day 4 years ago he met Deadpool. 

“I don’t know.” He hid his face in his hands, he didn’t feel like existing. “I just want Wade to be okay, so we can go home.” Gods he hated this. Wade had been doing so well too, it had been almost six months since Deadpool had last taken control. Peter didn’t know what to do. Could he do anything? 

“I’m gonna go see Wade.” Peter dragged his blanket with him, wearing it like a cape. He ignored the concerned look on Tony’s face. He stopped halfway to the elevator but didn’t turn around. “I love him Tony,” he paused, “every part of him.” 

Peter was still wrapped in his blanket when he stopped to talk to Dr. Banner. 

“Hello Dr. Banner, how is he?” Peter greeted the older man. 

“We gave him an MRI and it matches with Wade, so he is stable again. He’s sleeping in 012 if you want to see him.” Banner finished his report. “Oh and Peter, you can call me Bruce you know.” He tried to lift Peter’s spirit a little with the last comment. It didn’t help much but there was a slight tug on Peter’s lips, Bruce ruled it a success. 

Wade looked so peaceful in the hospital bed. Bruce had given his skin some ointment to soothe the raging sensation and the inflammation had gone down. His head was resting on about seven pillows, the sight made Peter snort. 

“Someday you’re gonna replace me with pillows.” Gently he brushed Wade’s cheek, he didn’t want to wake him. Peter laid down in the bed. Peter spread out his stolen blanket over them both, despite Wade already sleeping under one. Then he cuddled up to his fiance who automatically hugged him closer. Peter wished they would never have to wake up.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky makes an appearance and so does Deadpool.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update at the end

He woke up with a warm body pressed to his chest. Slowly he opened eyes to a tiny bit, just in case he had to pretend to be dead. But he didn’t. 

(Why are in a hospital?) 

[Who cares?! Look at the cutie in our bed]

And cute he was. Chocolate brown hair decorated the head that was resting on his chest, a cute little nose bore a light dusted pink color. He had a strong jaw and soft cheekbones. Oh, he was a looker alright, and yellow bet all his money the beauty had deep brown eyes. 

The beauty groaned softly and rubbed his eyes. Yellow had been wrong, those eyes weren’t just deep brown, they were endless. A deep hazle sea looked up at him, the little glimmers of honey in them gave them an unreal feeling, like a warm autumn day had taken shape in this one man’s eyes. 

“Hey babe,” Peter yawned and stretched. 

“Babe? How about you take me for dinner?” Deadpool smirked. He could this boy for dinner and for dessert he could eat his a-

“Wade?” 

“Yeah? Honey biscuit… that’s me.” Deadpool lied, he needed to know how Wade of all people could land a cutie like this. 

Peter smiled softly, god he was beautiful. His eyes shone like the sky had to give away the dreary clouds in exchange for sunny skies. Little flicks of gold reflected in his eyes, Deadpool was gonna fall for this man. This man currently climbing into his lap. 

“Are you okay?” The brunet asked as he took Deadpool’s face in hands. He’s looking at me like I’m a lost puppy, he thought, he knows I can kill in 27 ways just with these sheets right? He never would though, Deadpool might unalive a lot of people, but he knew right from wrong. 

“I’m Fonzie baby.” He closed the space between them and it was heaven. Deadpool moaned at the tenderness of Peter’s kiss and the sweetness of his lips. 

“That might just be the best kiss I’ve ever had.” Deadpool was floating on cloud nine, the statement made Peter snort and painted his cheeks a dusty pink. If anyone hurt this boy he would remove their kneecaps and replace them with their elbows. 

“Really?” Peter looked smiled softly and looked at him with lingering eyes. “Better than our first kiss after we caught Green Goblin? Better than our 2 year anniversary on that rooftop? Better than when we got engaged and you fucked me into the floorboards? Wade Winston Wilson, you disappoint me.”

[Hold the f**king phone]

(Wade?)

[This little twink thinks we’re that repressing douche bag]

(Is that how we suddenly know his name?)

“Mr. Parker,” JARVIS, “Mr. Rogers would like to see you, he and Mr. Barnes are on their way up.” Peter signed, he cuddled himself into the warm, leather covered chest beside him. Just a few more minutes, he thought, I like it when he gets soft like this. But Peter got up anyways, duty calls or rather, Captain America calls. 

He leaned down to kiss his fiancé, a simple kiss of the lips. Peter could feel Wade’s smile on his own and a warm feeling spread in his chest. The brunet caressed the rough skin on the other’s head, feeling the bumps dancer under his fingertips. 

“Love you,” he waved with his back turned as he walked out of the room, leaving Deadpool to finally talk with the boxes. 

“What the H E double hockey sticks is going on?” He whisper yelled, just in case the sweet brunet was near. 

[He’s obviously engaged to Wade]

(But we are Wade)

“Does that mean he’s our fiancé too?” God he sure hoped so. Deadpool hadn’t had this feeling for years, not since Vanessa at least. There was a knock on the door.

“Wade?” A man with shaggy brown hair walked in the door. He was wearing a dark green hoodie, but Deadpool could still see the metal beneath it. 

(Who is that guy?)

[Author thinks he’s kinda hot]

“Hey bro…” why the fuck did he say bro? He needed to keep a low profile to find out what lies Wade had been living. Luckily the other man just chuckled. 

“It’s Bucky, I’m your friend,” he explained gently. He stopped a good distance from the bed. Who was this “Bucky” guy? He looked friendly, with his gentle eyes and shiny hair. The air around him seemed to radiate with calm energy-

“So you must be Deadpool.” 

“WHAT?”

[How the f*@k does he know?!]

“Wha- hah, no I’m Wilson- Wade… to think I AM Deadpool, that is an insult, good sir,” Deadpool’s heart was racing, knees weak, palm sweaty, mom’s spaghetti. He couldn’t just kill this guy, right? Would he even be able to? If he was fast and surprised him, he might be able to. 

“Don’t make me explain to Peter how you ended up in that hospital bed with several stab wounds.” He pulled out a knife from behind himself, as it to prove a point. “I’m here to help you.” 

“How do you know me?” His voice was stern, trying to be intimidating. 

“I’ve been waiting for you,” Bucky said, his words thick with mystery. “Peter is a friend of mine, you see, and he loves Wade. But you, you terrify him.” Deadpool’s heart sank in his chest, he hadn’t known Peter for more than a few minutes, but he could feel Wade’s emotions for him like they were his own. 

“Why would you help, what’s in it for you?” He had to have a motive of some kind. Strangers don’t just help strangers out of the kindness of their heart. Especially not when the strangers are at hospital for supers. 

“Partly because I see myself in you,” he paused, “partly to get Steve of my back.” He chuckled again. 

(Who’s Steve?) 

[The hedge from Over the Hedge]

“I don’t think he’s talking about a hedge guys.” Voices man. He looked up to see Bucky staring at him. 

“Okay, before we do this I need to ask you some personal questions.” Bucky pulled up a chair to Deadpool’s bed and a notebook from his pant pocket.

“Ugh can’t we just cut to the montage of us bonding and go directly to me being fixed?” Deadpool whined, he hated therapy. 

(This isn’t a movie)

[We can’t montage in a fanfiction] 

“No.” Bucky shot him down immediately. “Who are you right now, Wade or Deadpool? Straight forward question.” 

“Why is Peter afraid of me?”

“That’s not how this works, I ask and you answer.” Bucky had the eyes of a soldier, and the will of ten.

“Oh no Bucky boy, if you want answers I want them too. One super to another.” He needed to know these things if he wanted to stay. “Picture comment for picture comment,” Bucky grumbled, it was clear he only wanted the answers and not the questions. 

[Someone isn’t a people person]

“Fine,” the brunet muttered, “now answer me. Who are you?” Oh, he was a brute, wasn’t he?

“That’s complicated. Wade Wilson existed and then I happened, I can’t remember why.” If only he knew how Deadpool came to happen to Wade Wilson, maybe Wade and he could get along. “We used to be the same person as Tony Stark is Iron Man. The Deadpool part of us, White guesses that’s “me” now. And Wade doesn’t like me anymore.” Deadpool air quoted the “me” part. He was Wade and vice versa on some level, they still shared the same emotions. 

Bucky’s steal eyes were looking at the floor like it would give him an answer. The wrinkles on his forehead looked like they could supply the whole hospital with wifi. He inhaled sharply before he looked at Deadpool again. 

“So if you were the same once, when did you stop?” He was searching for the right words. He was coming up short. 

(It’s our turn to ask now)  
[Yeah mom says it’s our turn on the computer!]

“Nope,” Deadpool said popping the p. “My turn Bucky Bear, why is Peter afraid of me?”

“You kill people, people who - people who should have been prosecuted in a court of law.” It didn’t sound like his own words, like something he had learned. “We only know Deadpool, this you as a murderer without control. If Wade doesn’t like this side of you he could have told Peter you were nothing but that.” Bucky was thinking about loud. “But you were the same person, what happened?”

“I can’t remember, brainwash?” His comment made Bucky go quiet. He stood up from the chair and walked over to the window on the other side of the room. His back was turned to the super in bed, the silence hung between them. 

“It's not brainwashing. You’d have a trigger, someone controlling you. You’d attack anyone in your way, even if you loved them you wouldn’t know.” Bucky’s tone was somber, haunted by his past, he knew too much to have been a bystander. Deadpool couldn’t tell if he had been attacked or the one attacking. 

“Will Wade remember this?” Bucky was still turned away from him.

“I don’t know.” He truly didn’t. He didn’t remember being Wade after that mission- 

“The mission…” he mumbled, tasting the words before trusting them. “We were on a mission, back when we were I.” That caught Bucky’s attention, at least enough to make him look at the merc. 

“When? Where? There might be SHIELD records on it.” He walked briskly towards the bed. “What were you doing on that mission?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UPDATE: From now on I will be updating once a month

**Author's Note:**

> So the first chapter, it feels good to be back in the saddle. Hopefully, I'll update more frequently than last time and with CAS as my carrot what could go wrong... be sure to leave a comment!!


End file.
